Light Blogging Days:
I'm stepping away from the computer for a few days.
I'm going to Moderate comments during this time since there have been a few feisty posts recently. I'll check them almost every day.

Merry Christmas!!

Happy Birthday Steve!

My buddy Steve Argue turns 40 today! I wish I could have been in Grand Rapids this week to see my buddy Steve. I met Steve a year ago or so and he's been a good influence on me. He's wicked smart and has and super creative. I got to hang with Steve last month in Nashville and I'm looking forward to the next time I get to see this old man! He seems to be growing his hair out... it must be some kind of midlife crisis or something... or it might be some kind of marathon runners mindgame... will he shave his head before the Boston marathon???? I doubt it... but I think it would be cool!

Happy Birthday Steve!

Baby Mikayla, Christmas and Ben and Laura Borish:
It was 2am at home, snowing outside and Pam was in labor with our third child. She and I were both in denial. We were scheduled for a C-section a week or so from that night. Mikayla was coming. This can't be happening. Our boys are asleep across the hall we'd had a false alarm during the day one Sunday. Is this another one? What do we do? We call people a couple of the people who love us. In the middle of the night.

As I remember it. Laura answered. She sounded awake... which would be crazy because she has three kids of her own. As I told her the situation that was unfolding. Her response was, "What do I need to do? Do you want to bring the kids here? Do you want me to come there?"

Come here.

She was there in 15 minutes. Did I mention she lives 20 minutes away? and it was snowing?

Mikayla was born on Valentines day earlier this year.
But I'm writing this 5 days before Christmas and I'm remembering a few things.

Christmas is about community. It's about asking, "What do I need to do?"
Christmas is about remembering that it was Jesus who also said, "I'm going to come over."

Christmas is about being with the people who make you whole. Christmas is about serving others.

Christmas is about living within a proximity within our imagination that has not walls, that keep us from asking for help. For within these intertwined lives shame begins to disappear and we are more fully ourselves.

Feb 14th 2005 (and many many other days) Laura and Ben were Christ to us.

In the f l e s h.



Seeing a need and meeting it.

In search of the best coffee in Tulsa.

so far double shot at 18th and boston is the best. by far

Press Release:

It seems that Doug Pagitt, Brian McLaren and Tony Jones are catching some heat for meeting with Jews. People are reading a press release and making it a doctrinal statement. Because they are meeting, suddenly they are giving up on Jesus. Interesting.

In the past month I've met with a lot of people. I've shared a meal with unitarians, I've had coffee with a lesbian. I've hung out with people who are not christians. I've met with groups and individuals from a dozen or more denominations, including catholics. I've met with drug users and a sex addict.

what does that say about me?

Why does he do it?

It must be the money... oh wait! He's a volunteer... just now part time.
It must be for the popularity and glamour! oh wait! That's not it.

Look at technorati.com and type in "tony jones"

then say a prayer for Tony.

Websites:

If you have any desire to have a website that you can change the content at any time but you don't want to pay a bunch of money for it then email jimmy doyle.

Jimmy has developed a website that I use for the Riddle Group,. He sets up the basic template and then you fill in the content, adding pages as you want.

If you want to support a man who lives simply, seeks God and his kingdom, and lives a life of integrity, and you want a website for your family, ministry, wedding, graduation, company then call jimmy. Whatever he charges you won't be enough. You'll be building the kingdom bu supporting a man who dedicated his life to serving teens and the church and you'll get a sweet website too.

It would make a great christmas gift.
Planning a wedding? build a website that answers all the questions people are asking about travel, hotel, times of events etc.

Starting a business? Church Plant? Limited resources? Call Jimmy.

918.813.3258

or email him at

jimmy@liquidthinking.org

John Raymond:.
Last night I dreamt about a good friend of mine from Michigan. I don't remember anything about the dream, except that John walked in the room at the end of my dream and I felt deep emotion. I was overcome with joy and happiness. I miss John.

Update: Another picture of John at Sun studios in Memphis.. behind the mic of Elvis.
By the way.. John is an Elvis fan.
the second pic is with Tony, Josh and Dan on their pilgrimage to Graceland

.:6 years of writing:.

I started blogging in Oct. 2002. (in a different URL) I've moved my blog twice to it's current location. I remember when I started if I would keep it up. There were times when I took breaks. For months at a time. But for the most part, blogging has been a part of my life for 3 years. For me, blogging started as a tool to ask questions and test the waters of a new found life, within a new life in Christ. I'd been following Jesus for quite a long time. In 2000 I resigned from my position at Asbury UMC in here in Tulsa to find ways to get myself healthy again. I had become a work-a-holic youth pastor in "the fast lane" of youth ministry. I loved the adrenaline. I love the crazy work schedule. But I hated what it was doing to my family. Around the time I had been rethinking my work life, a situation occured within the congregation that led to me being a bit disallusioned with the institution. The church had fallen short, I caught the brunt of it and I didn't know how to handle it. I got angry. I started writing. At that point I started writing for theooze.com Eventually this became a weekly column of sorts. Titled "Riddle's Rants". This was before ranting was cool or common. Sure Dennis Miller did it. Andy Rooney too. But ranting in the church wasn't well accepted.(which on one hand is very sad.) Why did I rant? Was I angry? Someone. Dissinfranchised would be a better word. The church I read about in scripture,the people who walk with Jesus and follow him and the church as I had experienced were very different things. Ranting was excorism for me. I'm not talking about real demons here. I'm talking detox. I'm talking about every belief about the church, every concession and compromise I swallowed to stay in the system. That needed to come out. As I identified this poisons my personal method for ridding my body of them was writing. My writing on theooze.com became a significant part of my public and somewhat communal rehab. What was intriguing at the time was how my rants, were connecting with the souls of my people.

more later.

.:In case you were wondering:.

This is a very bad idea for a youth group fundraiser.




thanks to Marko for the link

Today is the 25th Anniversary of John Lennon's death

I discovered John Lennon's music inhigh school. I immediately bought the box set. I've always engaged much easier with John's music than the music of the beatles.

I wish John was still around. I wonder what kind of music he'd be making.

Marko's Rant and the Ladder of Inference:

I'm reading Marko's rant by a runt series and I think it's great stuff. Marko is doing a great job of clearly defining broad assumptions churches in America hold. This post was inspired by Marko and is not a critique of him. He is my muse. :-)

Herein lies the problem with rants*.

When you critique one person(or groups) assumptions, you insert your own assumptions in their place. This is the jist of the shift we are seeing in the world and in the church. A shift of assumptions.

This is basic systems thinking. (not to be confuses (too much) with systemitizers who Marko rants against)
Last centurty a guy named Chris Argyris developed what is now known as the "ladder of inference".

Here's how it works. I'll work from the bottom rung up to the top.

First. Rung number one.
Raw real life. Data. Everything going on around you. It is all that encompasses life, creation and behavior. Everything that is makes up this rung.

Second. Rung number two.
As we go through life we gather peices of data. Selected data. It's not complete, for to soak in all of life would overwhelm us. Simply to much to process. We see certain people. Other people are invisible to us. We hear certain noises, voices, smells and taste. Others do not make the cut. This step is our experience of the raw real life data and our selecting certain parts.

Third. Rung number three.
So now we have selected data. Experiences we call real. They are real. But not all of the picture. At this point we attach meaning to our selections. Is the data we've selected good? Bad? Helpful? Hurtful? Painful? We give meaning to the data at this point in the ladder.

The Fourth Rung of the Ladder.
We develop an assumption. This happens fast. Very fast. BAM! Just like that we have experienced life, selected data, given it meaning and now we are working the data. Who? what?when? where? why? Here is a big leap.

B-I-G L-E-A-P ! !


Rung number Five.
At this point in the process we come to some conclusions. The conclusions are built upond our assumptions, which are given life from the meaning we attached to the selected data we mined from all of life. We all have conclusions. Jr high students always _________. fill in the blank. Sushi is _______. Suburban white people are ________. Tori Amos is ________. Parents can be _________. No matte what you put in these blanks, these are your conclusions. You are drawing conclusions right now as you read this. About me, the author. My writing ability, or lack there of. Conclusions are the firm ground we build for ourselves born from assumptions we create from the meaning we give certain experiences we have in life. Conclusions are the food for rung number six.

Rung number six.
From our conclusions we develop beliefs. When we put together our conclusions they become our beliefs. Beliefs about God. Beliefs about humankind, marriage, nature, business and institutions. There's one more rung, but before I share it with you. It's important to note that this rung of belief serves as a lens by which we select new data from the world. It also serves as a benchmark by which we give meaning to that data. If you want to know why it's hard to overcome childhood experiences... this is it. Our past influences our future. This can only be changed by some kind of outside encounter that breaks through assumptions and conclusions we make. This is why the way of jesus is so miraculous and important. Some people may call this a world view. Others may call this a script.

In systems theory, when a belief influences what new data we select and what meaning is attributed to that data , it's called a feedback loop. It snowballs and reenforces previous beliefs.

Rung number seven.
Action. Argyris argues that belief informs action. What you believe about the world and how it works and how God relates to it, informs how you relate to the world. How you treat people, how you live within nature, etc.

All that being said.
It is certainly not wrong to critique or rant, but is serves us well to understand why we are ranting, and what it is in us and others that informs our understanding about God and mankind.




*and I love rants. Back in 2000-2001 I wrote a rant a week for a column on theooze.com

Johnny Cash:

Watch the Hurt Video:

HURT (Johnny Cash)

Video Code provided by VideoCodeZone.Com

Dancing on the Inside:

A few weeks ago, I dropped by a local Christian high school to say hello to a new friend, who happens to be the Superintendent. This man is in his early to mid 50's. He had some time, so I sat down in his office and we talked. He shared with me his growing desire to live out the good news. As we spoke he became more and more excited. He was sitting on the edge of his chair as he spoke. Wonder filled his voice.

"For some many years, I held a narrow view of the gospel. I'm learing about the kingdom of God and it's freeing to me."

Then he shared a word picture that helped me understand him, and others who have served the church far longer than I and who working with sometimes restrictive environments.

He said, "Have you seen the ipod commercial?" (Link )
Which one I ask.

"The commercial where the woman is walking, she looks serious or at least complacent, but as she walks by you can see her reflection. The reflection is dancing. Not gentle docile dancing, but she's leaving her feet, jumping, twirling, full of vibrancy and life."


He paused.

"That's me."

Some of us have to be a certain way around church, but there is a part of us that wants out. A part of me that wants to dance.

So friends. Go dance.

If you don't dance. Part of you will die.

To me the emerging conversation, my consulting churches and my life has turned into finding ways of helping people dance.